Should we have another baby?

by jessicaturner on May 20, 2014

I hate being pregnant.

Like, really, really despise every minute of it. My first midwife said to me, your body really isn’t made for pregnancy. She said it as a way to commiserate, but it is sort of the truth.

When I went to the hospital to have Adeline, I signed the paperwork to have my tubes tied, should I have a c-section.

I ended up not having a c-section, but we planned to still be done after two children.

Yet, for the past year, I have been feeling the tug for one more baby. I all of a sudden felt like our family wasn’t quite complete.

I asked friends and strangers with three kids how they juggled the responsibilities. I asked working moms and stay-at-home mom. Matthew and I have prayed a lot about it.

In the end, I couldn’t shake the feeling that though I didn’t know how we would do it, we were supposed to have one more baby.

So this January we started trying to get pregnant. We thought it would happen right away, as it did for Elias and Adeline.

It didn’t. Month one went by, then two and three.

I began to doubt. Maybe we weren’t supposed to have another.

But then, it did.

BigSiblingsNo, I did not pose them. Ha!

We are so very, very excited. I am already super sick, so prayers are much appreciated. I’m throwing up about three times a day (although yesterday was six or seven… I lost count). Though I have gone through this twice before, I am still REALLY miserable. Being that I work full-time, I come home and basically pass out. Not fun. Please forgive any quiet periods here on the blog. :)

Adeline is convinced it is a girl and says we should name her Elsa or Anna (naturally). We have told her that it might be a boy, in which she has conceded that Christoph would be a good choice.

I’m due January 6, 2015 – a month or so before my book comes out. Yep. A baby and a book. Seems like 2015 is going to be a year of birth.

So tell me. Do you have three kids – or more? What lessons have you learned?



{ 88 comments… read them below or add one }

Melissa May 20, 2014 at 5:21 am

Congratulations! Prayers sent your way for feeling better. This same question is on my heart right now. I am praying for a clear answer either way. :) So, thank you for sharing your honest struggle with the decision. Wishing you all the best!

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Julie May 20, 2014 at 5:39 am

Welcome to the club, friend. You’re about to be outnumbered! Three is a lot of fun and third babies are the best! Congratulations!

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Erica May 20, 2014 at 5:43 am

Congratulations on your third pregnancy. I have followed your blog for a couple years! I have kids around your kids ages. Having a third child is the best and hardest thing we have done. You can do it! I had the best experience nursing and caring for my third baby because I had done it all before and I was so peaceful. My third child is the sweetest, kindest, funniest child and I can’t imagine my life without him! :) Having three young children in your home is hard, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world. Blessings to you and your family!

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Jen L. May 20, 2014 at 5:53 am

Congratulations!

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Linda May 20, 2014 at 6:24 am

Congratulations to all of you! How exciting! I hope you start feeling better really soon.

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Kristen May 20, 2014 at 6:37 am

We just had our third baby in January. I’m not going to lie – the first few weeks were hard. (Sorry!) But we’re settling into our routine now, and my baby girl is such a sweet, calm, joyful presence that I can’t imagine our family without her. Now that she’s almost four months old, I don’t feel that 3 is all that different from 2. After all, once you have a certain amount of little kid craziness in your house, what’s a bit more? ;-) Prayers for a safe, smooth pregnancy!

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Jessie May 20, 2014 at 6:49 am

Congratulations! Prayers for a healthy pregnancy and the strength to get through the daily sickness. I’m a third kid and I’m always grateful that my parents didn’t stop at two kiddos. Many blessings! PS…My first born’s birthday is Jan 6….great day for a baby!

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Sarah K May 20, 2014 at 7:04 am

So thrilled for you Jessica!!! Still praying for relief from the sickness!!

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Jackie Carl (Marion, IN) May 20, 2014 at 7:21 am

Congratulations, Jessica!

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Ashley May 20, 2014 at 7:25 am

Exciting!! I’m 26 weeks pregnant with my 3rd. My story is about the same. Lots of prayer went I to the decision to have this one because my pregnancies are horrible. It took us about 6 months to get pregnant even though I got pregnant quickly with my first 2.
I’ve been very sick and super tired and have to give myself a lot of grace. Hope you feel better soon and everything goes well.

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Eleanor May 20, 2014 at 7:25 am

Congratulations! I remember praying about having the 4th child. And then the daily throwing up. I finally told my friends that I needed meals in the first trimester more than I needed them after the baby was born. My advice is to set priorities with your husband. Dinner at home was one of our but a spotless house was not. We also cleared extra things off out plate. My baby is now 9 and as hard as it has been I have loved having more kids.

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Jacqueline May 20, 2014 at 7:29 am

Congratulations! What exciting news!

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Beth May 20, 2014 at 7:31 am

Congratulations!!! (Praying for relief from the yuckiness for you, too!)

We have three girls, but never intended to…or third is our “bonus baby”. They are almost 14, 11 and 3. I was working part-time when I was pregnant with our little one (I was fortunate enough to stay home with my older two) and started a full-time job when she was 2. I won’t lie, it’s tough with all three of them having different schedules and both my husband and I working full-time. But when I get tired or frustrated is just when the little one does something cute or funny – she’s our jokester (and the one that gets in trouble more than her sisters ever did!). We really can’t imagine life without her – and her big sisters are such a help. I love hearing her ask, “Where are my sisters?” when she wakes up or when they aren’t home.

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Megan Bruch May 20, 2014 at 7:34 am

Congratulations! I, like you, hated pregnancy. We decided to have 2 children and started trying a bit before he turned 2. He was a first-month deal, as were my sister’s 2 kids, so we assumed the same. A month went by, two, six, eight. . . After 9 months we conceived. And had a miscarriage. About 6 months later we got pregnant again. And lost that one too. I was ready to quit, but I still felt led to have another baby. A few months later we got pregnant again – with twins! I carried them for 33.5 of the hardest weeks of my life, including intense sickness and multiple hospitalizations. But in 14 days they turn 2 years old and their big brother is just as in love with them as we are. And it was all so very worth it. (But NOW I’m done!) Hang in there!!

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Monica May 20, 2014 at 7:39 am

Congratulations! I am also a mom of three. Didn’t plan on it because our twin girls were born 12 weeks early and in the NICU for a few months but God had other plans and shortly after the girls turned one, I found out baby number 3 was on the way. He was the best surprise and although it was hard juggling three babies, it has gotten easier as they have gotten older. It is nice to have them so close in age too as they pretty much do everything together. My girls are now 11 and my son will be 10 in three weeks. It is crazy but so fun. Good luck to you, hope the morning sickness subsides!

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Jessica Kelley May 20, 2014 at 7:41 am

Congrats! We’re about to start trying for our third (I’m determined to have a spring/summer baby this time!) I guess I’m “that” girl, because even though I’m sick throughout, I still just love being pregnant. We’ve parented three for the last nine months, with our foster baby, and it’s not too much tougher than two. You can totally do it! Hope you start feeling better soon, and best wishes!

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Shellie May 20, 2014 at 7:50 am

Congratulations!!! So sorry you’re sick :(
Can’t wait to see pics of Turner Baby #3 :)
We had our first in December and were in the studio the day before I was induced, so we know all about welcoming a baby into the world and releasing another kind of baby at the same time. It’ll be great…and will probably make for another book ;)

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Pink Ronnie May 20, 2014 at 7:57 am

Just popped in and saw the exciting news – congratulations Jessica!
I completely empathise with the nausea and generally feeling miserable in that first trimester. It’s one of my least favourite parts of pregnancy….
Will pray for you.
Ronnie xo

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Heather B May 20, 2014 at 8:00 am

I am so excited for you!! We have 4 kids and it is tag team all the way! They are 16, 10, 6 & 2! But I wouldn’t change any of it!! The youngest was due on Jan. 4th but he decided to come on Christmas Day! So that could happen!!! He was our surprise blessing! Best surprise I have ever received!! Praying you start feeling better real soon!!

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libbywilko May 20, 2014 at 8:01 am

I’m so happy for you all, what a blessing to your family. I totally sympathise about the yucky pregnancy mine were both the same.. Just the thought of food would make me run to the bathroom. Hopefully it decreases later in the second /third trimester. Hope your friends and family can be a big support during this time. I also feel our family isn’t complete we have been trying since our second son was 18months he’s about to turn 6. So it’s been a long journey …I hope and pray we will add to our family… So thrilled for you and pray for a safe sound delivery of a healthy baby. Massive hugs.

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Kim May 20, 2014 at 8:02 am

Congrats on #3! We have three children and our last two are only 16 months apart. Yep, #3 was our bonus baby. My husband dairy farms and I work full time and was FREAKING out! I was so, so, so scared to have three kids in four years, but really going from two to three was easier for me than going from one to two. I also noticed my middle child really took on that role and fits very well into all the stereotypes of a middle child. Looks like your soon to be middle child will fit that role well, too! :) Enjoy the moments!

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Heather May 20, 2014 at 8:04 am

Congratulations!

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Julie M May 20, 2014 at 8:21 am

Congratulations! I also “decided” I would be happy with two children, mainly because I only wanted to be pregnant a max of two times. My hubby wanted three children. We both got what we wanted when I gave birth to twins my second pregnancy! Our first born was a two-year-old boy at the time. My twins are girls. There were so many challenges during that phase of our lives, including a full-time/overtime kind of job for me, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything. You can do it! Keep your eyes on Jesus and seek him for your satisfaction, rest, and peace. Children are indeed a blessing from the Lord!

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Tammy May 20, 2014 at 8:21 am

Congrats! I had hyperemisis which is excessive nausea and vomiting with a lot of weight loss. 3-4 months bed rest at the beginning as well as IV fluids and Zofran until delivery. Two healthy babies later I was told not to do it again, and I am okay with that so we became Foster parents to God’s children in need. Be sure to ask for help and be okay with that. This may be helpful as well: http://www.helpher.org/.

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Candace May 20, 2014 at 8:22 am

Congratulations! I am pregnant with my first and am due January 5. My husband and I are so excited! I haven’t been too sick, yet-just exhausted and crabby, with random naseau thrown in for good measure.

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Britney May 20, 2014 at 8:26 am

Congratulations :) We have 3 as well (just turned 5, 3.5, and 21 months – all girls) and in my experience going from 1 to 2 kids was way way harder than going from 2 to 3 kids! So hopefully that is encouraging for you! My third pregnancy was by far my hardest – as in, barely walking for last 15 weeks due to pelvic problems – but my 3rd baby was a DREAM as far as sleeping/eating goes. She is a super curious/adventurous almost 2 year old but is so easy in general – the hardest part of parenting her so far is keeping her from emptying every shelf and drawer in the house…haha! My older two ADORE her. Now I am thinking about #4…. :)

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Missy May 20, 2014 at 8:38 am

Congratulations! We only have two children, but we have struggled with the same questions and thoughts and prayers that you and Matthew had and we have also decided that God is calling us to have another child. I also am a miserable pregnant woman and hate being pregnant, but in the end we also just feel that pull that this is the right thing to do for us and our family. Congratulations again and best wishes for a smooth and easy rest of the pregnancy. God bless!

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Audrey McClelland May 20, 2014 at 8:48 am

I’ve learned with 5 kids…. that your love just keeps multiplying.
I sit and think that these children will always have anchors. Always have someone to have their back.
And I think of Christmas when they are older and think how very cool it will be to have a full house.
Blessings my friend.
More babies… it’s always a beautiful thing.
xo
Audrey

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Ashley G May 20, 2014 at 8:56 am

Congratulations…prayers too!

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Nurse Bee May 20, 2014 at 9:34 am

Congrats! I have 3 kids (5, 3, and 20 months), and I won’t lie, 3 seems to up the crazy factor a lot. Our 3rd was a bit of a surprise, but she is the sweetest thing and I’m so glad we have her.

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Jenny from Mommin' It Up May 20, 2014 at 9:37 am

Congrats! I am right there with you, hate being pregnant, not made for it, super-sick, I had c-sections because apparently I am not even made to push them out…my 3rd was a surprise so I DID get my tubes tied on the table with him. Of course, I can’t imagine our lives without him. I was one of three and I really thing three is the magic #. It is hard but great. Congrats, prayer will take you through these next few months. I threw up in a lot of unfortunate places with my third. :) It was worth it BUT I DON’T WANNA DO IT AGAIN! If we have another child, someone else will be bearing it.

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Mary B May 20, 2014 at 10:08 am

Mom of 3 but mine aren’t so little :) (18, 15 & 12). They are so fun but the 3rd one does shake things up. But, not in a bad way. My youngest is SO different from the other 2 but such a happy personality. All 3 are great friends and I love that they love each other.
There is a lot of “divide and conquer” but eventually the youngest will catch up. Congratulations! You’ll be great with 3!

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Carol, Carol, Carol May 20, 2014 at 10:09 am

Congratulations Jessica – I am very, very happy for you and your family. My granddaughter just had her 3rd baby – making me a great-grandma again!! Since I had 3 kids, I can honestly say number 3 is by far the easiest, most adored and always the baby!! Carol, Carol, Carol

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Mackenzie May 20, 2014 at 10:28 am

WOOOOHOOOO!!!! I am so excited for you!!!! I’m due with my 4th in 6 weeks and I have gestational diabetes for the 3rd time. It is not fun. But so worth it! So happy for you and your sweet family! Praying this pregnancy is easy and blissful ;)

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Julie, momto7 May 20, 2014 at 10:32 am

adding #3 was my easiest transition…praying all goes well for you!

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Shelbie May 20, 2014 at 11:03 am

Blessings to all of you!! What an exciting time. Praying that you feel better soon. We stopped at two kiddos but I did learn to ask for help more readily with my last pregnancy and I think it helped me to enjoy that experience so much more. I did the same thing after baby was born and never turned people down when they offered help and/or meals. Enjoy!!!

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Nanette May 20, 2014 at 11:22 am

Congrats! Having raised 7, 4 my own & 3 grandchildren, I think that although together time is very important, so is one on one time. I made sure I had alone time with each child during the week, even if it was only 15 minutes. I made that child the center of my world for that time. They loved it. We talked, did a project of their liking, read a few pages of a book, made cookies, whatever they wanted to do that was reasonable. Hope tgat helps.

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Amy K. May 20, 2014 at 11:33 am

What wonderful news (except the throwing up part). Will be praying that you find relief soon.

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Rachel E. May 20, 2014 at 11:42 am

Congratulations, Jessica & Matthew! I have followed your blog since before you had Elias and am so excited for you. I get horrible chronic migraines and have seriously considered not having children because of this, (a) because I don’t think I could do pregnancy for 9 months without being able to treat the migraines and (b) because I don’t want to pass on this condition to my children (everyone in my family gets them and I have it the worst–it is incapacitating). But reading your blog during the time you were pregnant with Adeline and seeing how you dealt with your migraines in such a godly way has made me reconsider completely shutting the door on that possibility. So excited for your family and so thankful that you have chosen to share your journey with us!

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Christine Koh May 20, 2014 at 12:37 pm

Oh pal, I’m so, so sorry you’ve been so sick! I hope the vomiting comes to an end soon! xoxo

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Barb from CNY May 20, 2014 at 12:53 pm

Congratulations! Such wonderful news! So sorry you are so sick but will prayer that you feel better soon.

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Sarah May 20, 2014 at 12:58 pm

Congrats!! Thanks for posting about the midwives when elias was born. We have used them since 2009 & are very pleased! Congrats on baby #3!! We are due with baby #3 dec 23!

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Melissa May 20, 2014 at 1:01 pm

Yeah you! I’ve got three girls-18, 16, 11- and while there may not always be peace in the house, my heart is full of joy! I remember hearing ( before I decided that I wanted another baby…because baby videos are so cute to watch and make you forget how hard toddlers can be) that you will never regret having another child but you may regret not having one. Those words stayed with me and my Katherine is keeping this 50 year old mom young and happy. Feel better, Jessica.

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Jennifer O May 20, 2014 at 1:13 pm

Congratulations on baby #3! I hope that you feel better soon. As someone nearing the end of my child raising years (21, 19 and 16) I can honestly say having 3 children was perfect for us. And when my 2nd child left for college, I was so thankful I still had one more child at home. I wasn’t ready to be “done”. I think I’ll be ready when its her turn.

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Katy Donaldson Taylor May 20, 2014 at 1:33 pm

I, unlike you, LOVE BEING PREGNANT…mainly because I don’t get migraines while pregnant but I also just LOVE the process!!! We have 4 kids (3 boys and a girl)…the ONLY difference I saw in having multiple kids was between one and two…once you have two, it’s pretty much the same with each one you add (I’m sure it will get a little more difficult if you have 7 or 8 though)! We want another baby…BAD!!! But…I think that once you get past 3 or 4, one parent really needs to stay at home and not work a full-time job. With 3 and 4 kids +, you have more sick kids, more doctor appointments, more school functions, etc…a stay-at-home parent alleviates all the stress that comes from having to ask off of work for the above mentioned “events”. CONGRATULATIONS on a 3rd baby!!! I hope your sickness subsides SOON!

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jessicaturner May 20, 2014 at 1:50 pm

Yes, we are grateful that while Matthew works full-time, his job is very flexible since he works from home. I am also grateful to have a great work-life balance. I can’t imagine it any other way.

Thanks so much for your well wishes.

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Susan May 20, 2014 at 1:56 pm

oh, how I hate to tell you this. You can’t have just three. because that means someone will have to be THE MIDDLE CHILD! and you wouldn’t want to do that to Adeline! :)

I know you can manage 3. Life will be more hectic, but more fun! I’ll be praying for you throughout your pregnancy! your little one will be blessed as they join your family!

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Marilyn May 20, 2014 at 2:01 pm

Congratulations!!!! The picture you captured of your two announcing your third baby is wonderful! I’m sure the three of them will have lots of fun!

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Andrea May 20, 2014 at 2:22 pm

Yay!! That’s so exciting!! I was convinced we were done at two, and then my husband asked me to consider one more, so I prayed and within a couple of months God changed my heart. And then I wanted one more, so I prayed and asked my husband to reconsider, and he didn’t. How does that work? ;) Actually, I kept praying and eight years later we discovered number four was on his way. But the thing that really got me was my hubby telling me he stalled on doing anything permanent because deep in his heart he always felt our family wasn’t complete. Anyhoo, congratulations!!

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Lillian May 20, 2014 at 2:31 pm

Congratulations! I was content with 2 children – then started feeling that call for another. Trusting in God’s will we went for it. Early in the pregnancy it felt *off* so I had an ultrasound. Imagine our surprise (and panic!) when it showed we were also getting #4 AND #5! With the triplets I was forced to admit I couldn’t do everything. I had to prioritize, let a lot of things go, and accept help. I’m not sure I would have learned those lessons any other way!

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Sara @ Mom Endeavors May 20, 2014 at 2:56 pm

Huge congrats to you! :) We have 3 and really, I found the transition from 2 to 3 SO much easier than 1 to 2!
Prayers that the sickness goes away for you as soon as possible!!

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Dana May 20, 2014 at 3:00 pm

Jessica,

I’ve never left a comment before, but had to respond to this! I also thought I was done after 2 kids, but for some reason we could never really say out loud that we were really done. Then we got a surprise! My youngest has been the biggest blessing! It was my hardest pregnancy, but she was my easiest baby. And while she is now in the terrible 2′s, I could not imagine doing life without her. We love having 3! And as I grew up in a family of 3 kids, I think it is the best! It can be crazy at times, but so fun. You just have to embrace the crazy and realize you will never have it all together :) Congratulations!! 3 is great!

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Meredith Bernard May 20, 2014 at 3:02 pm

Praying for your sickness. And blessings on your soon to be larger family. I only have two children, BUT I’ve felt this same pull for a while now. I ask my hubs and kids about having another child and they are indifferent. I’m sitting here crying for some reason. I don’t know how we would afford another. I don’t know where we would put another. But I found your site today and read this post today for some reason. Praying for you and praying for me. Hugs and blessings…Meredith

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Elizabeth May 20, 2014 at 3:09 pm

Congrats! I have 4 (ages 5, 3, 2, and 7 months. They are all about 19 months apart). Just remembered the beginning is usually the hardest and then you start to develop a system. And then you will look back and wonder how it was with *just* two. The unknown is always harder than what you are used to. And here’s hoping you don’t have to be too sick!

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Alyssa May 20, 2014 at 3:52 pm

Congratulations! Regardless of how difficult the pregnancies are, whether or not they are “planned”, children are always a blessing. I am due with #5 in August (I have a 7yo, 6yo in July, 4 1/2 yo, and 15 month old). We decided we were done at 4, but God had other plans! Five days after my husband’s vasectomy, I found out I was already pregnant and 7 days later, I fell and broke my ankle, which gave me time from work to chill and reflect on God’s goodness. And He is good! Praying for a healthy pregnancy and baby!

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Nirupama May 20, 2014 at 7:24 pm

Congratulations Jessica! I remember how hard this was on you with Adeline and hope this time flies by at least. Maybe all the distractions will help? I’m so excited for you guys that you are having a third. We just added our third baby a few months ago in February. It has been amazing so far and he really has increased the love in our family exponentially :) Love grows love!

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Kathy Frye May 20, 2014 at 8:03 pm

Congratulations!! I always new I wanted 3 children and found the third child was just easier in every way!!! I was more relaxed and laid back, my older two children were great helpers and my third child just went with the flow as we went to all his older siblings games and activities!!! Prayers for you during your pregnancy and many blessings!!!

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Dawn May 20, 2014 at 8:20 pm

CONGRATULATIONS!!! I am so happy for you! I have four kiddos – 8, 5, just turned 4 on Sunday, and sixteen months. What I’ve learned and am still learning is that I can’t do this in my own strength. I need Jesus!!! He gives me the grace and strength that I need day by day, moment by moment!

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Aimee May 20, 2014 at 9:23 pm

My fifth is almost 10 weeks old. My others are 12, 10, 7, and 4. To say that they are totally in love with him is the understatement of the year. I, too, hate pregnancy–Such horrible pelvic pain for seven out of nine months that I can barely walk at the end. But I can’t even imagine not doing it again when I see my bigs with my baby. It is the picture of grace at work, and it has called forth such goodness, service, self sacrifice, patience and love from them. I hope I always have room for more, however God sees fit to give them to us.

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Tiffany May 20, 2014 at 9:59 pm

Congratulations to you and your family!!! I’ve got four little ones and for me the hardest thing (and the biggest lesson learned) has been letting go of certain things and realizing that I can’t do everything. I know that sounds like a cliche, but it has become a reality in my world with a 5 year old, a 4 year old, a 3 year old and a 1 year old. Best of luck to you and God bless!

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Natalie G May 21, 2014 at 1:57 am

Congrats Jessica! I was much like you, I had two kids, spaced in age much like yours and also had the “tug” at my heart not knowing if I was done or not. My husband and I were really leaning toward being done for a while after having our two boys. Two boys are a HANDFUL. But God decided to surprise us with baby number three. I found out I was pregnant when my middle child was not even 2, so my middle 2 are pretty close in age. And my baby is a GIRL. She is now 11 months old. She has been the perfect addition to our family.

What has changed – I get more migraines (sorry) from lack of sleep in this stage, I have more laundry, I have a messier house, I have more bills (especially the grocery bill), etc. But I also have more snuggles, more laughs, more kisses, more love, etc.

I know you are very creative with your shopping (ha, the mom creative, see what I did there, I’m such a dork) and I’ve realized that by having more kids I have to say NO to my kids more. And that isn’t such a bad thing. Because they have to learn to share with their siblings, appreciate what they do have, and I have to reuse/sell/upcycle etc what we have because I can’t constantly buy everyone what they want. And that isn’t good for them anyway. But the more kids you have the harder it is to afford everything anyway.

The hardest thing for me so far – is to be everywhere I need to be. I also work full time (normal hours). Since baby girl has been born, my husband and I have had to tag team things even more, but with a third – someone is left out, or one of us has to pull double duty – like the daycare for Easter egg hunts in all 3 classes for all my kids (one at big school, and 2 in classrooms at daycare/preschool) for example.

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Natalie G May 21, 2014 at 2:01 am

And small world, Angie Smith was the guest speaker at our women’s event at Church in March. I’ve been following her Instagram Feed since. I noticed your kids on her feed one day (I’ve been following your blog for years). I was like……..hey…I know them!!! Well, internet “know” them. Small world right? Looks like Nashville has such a awesome Christian women’s group! Y’all are blessed!

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Renee May 21, 2014 at 10:13 am

Congratulations! I’m so happy for you! I feel your pain, I was also sick during the first trimesters of both of my pregnancies and it’s no fun :( You’ll get through this! The only thing that helped me was sipping ginger ale and nibbling on goldfish crackers :)

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Diana Trautwein May 21, 2014 at 1:50 pm

Congratulations, Jess – this is very sweet news. But I’m so sorry pregnancy is tough for you! It was one of the few things my body did really well! And I had 3 – in 4.5 years – and I was a SAHM until my last was a senior in high school, so I don’t know that I have much wisdom to offer from my own story. Except this – our 3rd was a complete surprise and within seconds of his birth, I could not imagine our lives without him. He made our family complete in a way I had not anticipated. He was the sickliest of our 3 as a baby – but also the most mellow and easiest companion for me. . .at least until puberty. :>) I’ve watched each of my daughters raise their 3 kids and they have made it look amazingly easy. Both of them work and have managed to juggle quite well. You will, too. I have NO doubt. Praying for a different kind of pregnancy experience this time – a more blessed and comfortable one. But mostly? For a healthy baby and a good transition for all five of you. Love you.

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Christy May 21, 2014 at 5:27 pm

Congratulations!! I have 5, so I say the more the merrier! (Unless of course it’s 6, then I don’t think I would be very merry)

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Stacy May 21, 2014 at 7:48 pm

No advice, since I only have 2 kids, but I wanted to say Congratulations!! I’m so excited for you guys!! Hang in there!!

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Jessica May 21, 2014 at 7:49 pm

First of all congratulations! Babies are a wonderful blessing. I’m hoping to get pregnant with our second in the next few months. One thing that helped me with my first pregnancy was just making the decision to be joyful through everything – morning sickness, tiredness and the good days. That made all the difference in the world for me. I found out I was pregnant just a few weeks before Sara passed away and I knew if she could be happy and joyful with her confined living situation, then I could be joyful during pregnancy. Best of luck :-)

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Carol May 21, 2014 at 10:33 pm

Jessica ~
I had difficulty getting pregnant with my first two pregnancies and I totally understand that feeling about baby number 3. Well, she just arrived unexpectedly and what a blessing and she certainly has made our family complete. I think of her as the topping on our cake ~ I was 35 when I had her and I thank God for her each day. You have a beautiful family ~ and I promise you ~ you will be blessed!
Carol L.

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Alicia May 22, 2014 at 9:50 am

I have 3 kids though the last one was definitely unplanned. At the time, I had one in going into 1st grade & thr other in pre-K. I was about to have 2 in school & planning on working in some capacity again or being a full time stay at home mom to kids in school. Yay, free time! (Wow, that sounds awful!) I couldn’t fathom having another child & even though the first 2 were fairly easy pregnancies, this one was a little rougher, though not as rough as yours. I’m so sorry! Anyway, our little one is 2 now & is such a ball of joy & craziness wrapped into 1. We had 2 girls & then our surprise boy so it’s been an even bigger eye opener. However, now I wouldn’t change a thing. Sure, sometimes I get jealous of friends who have more time to grocery shop without a toddler, but our family is blessed. It was a good thing too that my girls are a bit older than him. They have been great helpers! I hope you get to feeling better soon!

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Kaye May 22, 2014 at 1:20 pm

Congratulations! Will be praying for you to feel better.
Blessings today and always,
Kaye

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Alexis May 22, 2014 at 8:11 pm

Congrats Jess!

So happy for you and your growing family! :)

Wait, you have a BOOK?! Where’s the link to your blog post(s) about it? I did not know! But I believe it’s going to be a good read! :)

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Kate @ Songs Kate Sang May 22, 2014 at 10:42 pm

Congratulations! I’m thrilled for you!

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Janet May 23, 2014 at 1:58 pm

Congratulations! It is always a blessing making another soul to glorify God that will live for all eternity!

We have six blessings and every time we have prayed for God to lead us to what his will is for our life. Our culture says we need to live for ourselves; but God and his love multiples more than four fold with each new blessing we have received. It is not easy but God didn’t promise easy just that he would help us through the trials of life. I believe our goal is being open to God’s will in our life and he sure helps us to be selfless, and full of love when we are open to him. I would not wish for any less children; they make our life complete.

I will be keeping you in our daily family prayers. Not sure what kind of vitamins you are on but make sure you are getting your folic acid (at least 800mg although when pregnant I take even more~ more is best when pregnant)and a high B6 amount like at least 300mg. I add more B6 if I am feeling nauseated. I hope something will help you endure it better.

~God bless

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Alexis May 24, 2014 at 10:22 pm

Just a note of encouragement…you CAN do this and it will all be so worth it! Congrats to your sweet family! I’m pregnant with #5 (still shocking to write!). God has blessed us with FIVE girls, ages 3, 6, 7, 10. Although my pregnancies are rough and I’m so sick, I know I am living the life He has designed for me. I had a bad mommy day about three years ago. I went to church early to have some quiet prayer time. I knelt and prayed for guidance. I heard someone say, “you were created to be a mother.” I opened my teary eyes to see who somehow saw into my heart. Of course, the pew was empty…it was my God reassuring me. That day was a game-changer. You’re in my prayers! Can’t wait to read updates!

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Alexis May 24, 2014 at 10:27 pm

One more thing. I’ve always been on constant Zofran. This pregnancy they’ve given me Diceglis (sp?). It works! I’ve felt better than with the other four. I’m in my third trimester and still getting sick, but not as much. If I combine the two drugs I can almost act normal. Haha!

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Jo @ To a Pretty Life May 26, 2014 at 10:39 am

Congratulations! I hope this pregnancy is easier for you. We have two kids, a 6 year old girl and a 4 year old boy. It took me a long time to get to this point, but I’m convinced our family isn’t complete yet. My husband was always a 2-or-3-kids kind of guy, and I was a 4-or-5 kids girl. Now, I’d say I’m voting for 3 or 4 kids, while my husband currently things we might be done at 2. I really really want a third! But I can’t force him to make that decision, and any “oops” would have to be an act of God since I do Natural Family Planning for birth control so I always know when my fertile times are.

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Jenny B. May 27, 2014 at 6:33 pm

Congratulations! I saw some baby & pregnancy related things pop up from you on Pinterest, but somehow missed seeing this post. :) We have two boys (9 and 5), and I would be absolutely thrilled if I were to get pregnant with a third. I actually really loved being pregnant, and felt great most of the time. We’ve been “not preventing” for the past five years, though, and I am just pretty sure it’s not going to happen. :( I’m 38 now, and we had a hard time conceiving the first two (took more than a year and several months of Clomid both times). So… anyway, a “surprise” would be amazing, but we are not planning to go through all of the infertility stuff to try to get pregnant with a third. I keep hoping, though, because, with God, all things are possible.

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Ruth May 28, 2014 at 10:17 pm

I didn’t see this mentioned, but our third child came around the holidays and it was absolute chaos. I know you are really organized but Christmas and all the extra that brings plus having a new baby brings stress on a household. Prepare Prepare and prepare as much as you can in advance, because it will help take the stress off an already stressful time. Honestly, the year our son was born we didn’t even put up a tree because we didn’t have time. I wish I was more articulate but you are smart and you will plan all the stuff that should get done ahead of time.

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jessicaturner May 29, 2014 at 5:37 am

Yes, I have been thinking about that. I am good about shopping in advance, so that will help. And we obviously won’t travel this year. :) Thank you for bringing it up!

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Robin T June 1, 2014 at 9:04 pm

Congrats!! We have three – my husband had to talk me into the third but of course once she was here we felt “complete.” Like she was always supposed to be here. The transition from two to three was easier than from one to two for me – I guess I was already used to dividing up my attention and multitasking more. Enjoy! But hope you get to feeling better sometime before your due date :-( Phenergan?

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sl June 13, 2014 at 9:11 pm

Praying you feel better sooner than later. I understand, I was still throwing up at 9 months. No fun but worth it in the end. Have you tried ginger tea? I have heard it is wonderful to help. Of course I did not know about this when I was expecting.

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Becca June 21, 2014 at 7:20 am

His graciously added #3 to our family this January! She is a DELIGHT! I agree with so much that has been said–sometimes 3 feels like so much more work and logistics juggling than two was, but our lives are immeasurably more joyful since she was born 4 months ago. 💗. I had our holiday plans completed farther in advance than ever before which helped a lot those last few weeks.

My biggest “survival” aides have been my husband–with 3 I can’t even pretend I can do it all anymore. I NEED his help and he always helps. Also, practically speaking, the crockpot is about the only way we get a home cooked meal around here. :)

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Sharon F June 21, 2014 at 4:10 pm

Our “third baby” ended up being twins. I had just convinced myself that 3 was a perfectly normal amount of children and then the ultrasound showed that there were 2! It’s been crazy but I wouldn’t have it any other way.

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Karla June 22, 2014 at 1:20 pm

I have three children, and my third (currently 16mos) is named Adeline! My other two are Gwendolyn (age 6) and Josiah (4). Most of the time I take it one day at a time, and sometimes I feel like I’m going insane because I’m with them 24/7. I’m homeschooling so I don’t miss a thing! The days when my husband is home and we’re all together, the kids are getting along, we’re enjoying ourselves, I can so easily see having more children (I’m one of five myself). Even if we decided we were done, I would hate to take away the option!

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Coby June 23, 2014 at 8:21 pm

De-lurking (such a creeptastic phrase, but I promise I’m not a creep!) to say congratulations on your pregnancy! Woo-hoo! I have 3 boys – 7 year-old twins and a 4 year-old, and I love it! Going from 2 kids to 3 was challenging for me because when I’m at home by myself during the day (I homeschool them) I’m out of hands, and my husband and I are outnumbered! :-) BUT, having 3 adds a touch of fun chaos, and my 3rd is such a joyful, hysterically funny part of our family! With the third child, I’ve really learned to let go of my need for perfection and to just roll with things! We’re praying and believing God for a 4th child; if this happens, I’ll REALLY have to roll with things! Praying for you and your pregnancy!

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Leonie June 24, 2014 at 4:25 am

Congratulations! I have just come across your blog and stumbled onto this post. I am from NZ, I have four children #1 and #2 were planned and are 22 months apart. Like you, we didn’t feel complete at two but decided to wait a few years before having one or two more. However God had other plans and when my second was 9 months old we feel pregnant … with twins, so #2, #3 and #4 were only 18 months apart. Life has been crazy, busy, tiring but rewarding, fun and enjoyably mad. I have struggled, but I would never regret the children I have and I am so pleased that our beautiful identical twin girls joined our family. My children are now 6, 4, 3 and 3. It does get easier as they all get older and more indepdent – we have different challenges now to a year ago. Good luck. Don’t be afraid to ask and ACCEPT help. You will be fine, because your their mum.

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Shelley June 24, 2014 at 11:54 am

Congratulations and sympathies for the being sick part.

After having two children I also felt quite strongly about wanting a third. I searched my heart and soul because I was often sick with my first pregnancy and always sick during my second. When you’re sick all the time you keep telling yourself, I’ll get through this. And you do :-) After a difficult labour and delivery (all horror stories aside) and a child born in distress I was sure that I could not go through ‘that’ again.

My husband was adamant – no more. It wasn’t because he didn’t want more children in our family but rather because of what he saw as the toll it took on me. Friends and family thought I was nuts for wanting a third but that feeling did not go away. However, my husband scheduled himself for a vasectomy and despite arguments remained sure that we should not try again. I know that if I had said do NOT do that, he wouldn’t have but he took the initiative because he knew I wouldn’t (I should add that I have a congenital spinal defect that made the last trimester quite painful).

Whether or not this was the ‘right’ decision doesn’t matter and really can’t be determined, can it? You face choices and make decisions at the time, with what you know and within the ‘arena’ of that time.

That feeling of wanting to have a third child did not go away for years. Years. But I’m 57 now and we have two wonderful girls who are now adults in their own right, so we’re blessed.

I’m a firm believer in appreciating your blessings where you find them. I found them in 35 years of marriage and two children so I’m good. Very good :-D If I had to go back and face that decision again would I choose having a third child? Well, given the same set of circumstances I’m sure that we would go the same path. It’s a personal and individual (between couples) choice and one that once you make, you’re on that path and you count your blessings from there. Sometimes I think we over-analyze our choices too much but then at least we’ve asked ourselves the questions we need to move ahead whichever road you take. And….it’s not always about making the ‘right’ choice but perhaps the best choice. So, thanks for sharing, it brought back some memories – pretty much all good :-)

all the best to you and your growing family. :-)

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Michele June 29, 2014 at 11:11 am

Read Jessica’s post and comments a few weeks ago and for some reason felt (God definitely) had me go back to this post again! Thank you Shelley for sharing your comments. :-) We have 2 girls and just went through vasectomy. It was much debate whether or not to have a 3rd. We admit; we are not crazy about newborns, but LOVE when they are 1 on. :-) So its not a ‘I want to hold a little baby’. Its more of the silly things toddler do and say and how they learn. Pregnancy was hard on me and after the 2nd I went through many health issues including anxiety, possible PCOS, etc. It took over a year to get myself back to a good place and finally in the best shape of my life since high school! :-) Plus we went through a dramatic delivery with the 2nd. Hubby said it is really up to you on a 3rd since I have to carry it, but he was either way on a 3rd. There’s no guarantee it would be a boy and he was really really was afraid of something happening to me or a baby if we would try for a 3rd because of all the past issues. So he was leaning toward no. He said not having a boy doesn’t bother him at all; he loves our kids because you can’t choose what you have (only God does!) :-) I then said you know, I never really pictured having kids but the times I always thought two. Of course I thought boy/girl. But then boys really scare me due to a brother being autistic and I feel that would trigger much anxiety, over-analyzing and lead me down a path I never want to go to again. I felt like I lost over a year with my kids in that time and thought maybe this is God’s way to tell us we are done with kids. Plus we waited another 2 years after discussing it. Got rid of everything and didn’t tear up and say ‘stop I don’t want to do this.’

So procedure is done and I have being tearing up thinking ‘did we make the wrong decision?’ But what really struck me is that you said ‘appreciating the blessings where you find them’. I have two great girls and a great husband. That is a blessing as I have relatives who never married, no kids, or can’t have kids. Our marriage has taken a strain over these past early years with the kids. Now I think we can really work on ‘us’ and as I’ve always read; marriage needs to be most important so that our kids thrive too; not always focusing solely on them. So thank you so much for sharing. This post gave me peace that I was praying and seeking for. (and writing this out helps!)

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