What do you Worship?

by jessicaturner on March 12, 2009

I have had this post in my head for a week and a half, and am just sitting down to write it because I feel moved by the holy spirit to share this message right now. Of course, my head is fighting this, thinking, you were going to get dinner made this morning and you just put Elias back down to sleep, so you should be in the shower, but I am going to ignore it and write anyway.

I hope this meets one of you where you are at. I have a feeling it will.

Pete
is doing a new series at Cross Point called Backseat Jesus – the idea being that we don’t let Jesus be the driver of our lives – we just let him ride in the backseat, there when we need him, but depending on him when necessary to get us where we need to go.

Watch this:
[download]
Back Seat Jesus_Promo from Cross Point Church on Vimeo.

People, this is me so often. I am type A, controlling, goal-oriented, driven. While these can be great qualities (if used in the right way) and I have been successful in school and work because of these characteristics, they can also be ugly, especially in my relationship with God. You see, I am not good at trusting him. I know he is there. I know I can go to him. Yet, I don’t always let him direct my paths.

Are you like this?

Two Sundays ago Pete talked about the gap between the current you (how people see you/how you actually are and the imagined you (what you would like to be, how you think you are)). We fill this gap by:

faking it.
working it.
switching it.
quitting it.

He said: “there’s something in your life you pursue more than God. For most people it is something morally neutral (family, friends, work vs. something morally “bad” like drugs). Follow the trail of your time, money and affection and at the end you will find a throne of what you worship.”

He went on to say “Idoltry will more likely be what you do than what you say.”

I have been thinking about this a lot and have come up with many things that often (at different times) get pursued in my life more than God.

my family
my work
scrapbooking
photography
saving money
this blog

gulp.

I am ashamed. Ashamed that I have let myself get in the way of my relationship with God. And so, I pray and ask for forgiveness. Daily. I am trying to seek him more throughout the day. I am watching how I spend my time and what my priorities are. I know I will stumble – every day.

Thankfully, God is big, merciful and forgiving.

Does this resonate with you? How do you spend your time? Do you need to refocus and get Jesus out of the backseat?

You can watch Pete’s sermon here.

I know I have said this before, but I am going to say it again. Thank for so much for coming along side of me in this journey. I can’t tell you how much your kind comments and emails mean to me. I am so grateful and humbled by it all.

I’m going shower now. Then make dinner. :)
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{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }

Mallory March 12, 2009 at 1:00 pm

Very true, Jessica. This is something everyone, no matter who you are or what age you are, can relate with. I think it’s human nature, one of our many flaws, to forget that God needs to be the center of everything in our lives, 24/7. There can be so many things going on at one time that we each lose focus, but all we have to remember is to pray and ask for forgiveness and use our Type A selves to refocus and be driven to do what He wants. :)

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Lauren Kelly March 12, 2009 at 1:17 pm

Jessica, thank you a million times over for this. I needed it. It’s amazing how our priorities can get off balance!!! Love ya, my friend, and love your blog!!! 😮 )

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Susan March 12, 2009 at 1:22 pm

Thanks for sharing this.

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Marla Taviano March 12, 2009 at 1:31 pm

I loved this post, Jessica. Thanks so much for your honesty and transparency.

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Baby be Blessed March 12, 2009 at 1:38 pm

It is awesome when we can come together…share our in our walk with the Lord and encourage each other!

Many Blessings!!
Tina

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Stacey March 12, 2009 at 1:39 pm

Thanks Jessica, I needed that. I am very sick with strep throat right now and can not be near my baby. For the last two days I have been feeling sorry for myself instead of thinking about ways to change what got me here. I was so busy being Type A me that I lost my way. Instead of letting Jesus lead me, I was leading myself right into overload. Now my body is worn out. So glad it took you a week and a half as I am not sure I would have really “got it” before this week.

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Sassy March 12, 2009 at 1:47 pm
Matthew Paul Turner March 12, 2009 at 2:32 pm

I love you, sweetpea..

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cantwait30 March 12, 2009 at 3:22 pm

Thank you for sharing of yourself Jessica. I am right there with you … very similar personality type, very happy to depend on God WHEN I NEED HIM, but not truly have the relationship I should. Thank you for bringing up such a great point that really hits home.

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Dawn March 12, 2009 at 3:44 pm

Well said. I just left my job so I could get rid of the gap…and I didn’t realize how out of whack things were. This was a blessing. Thanks!

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Kristina March 12, 2009 at 3:59 pm

Jessica you are not alone in this. Although of course we have different things we favor over Jesus, we still unfortunately favor OTHER things.
For me, I find I get so caught up in the church itself and what is going on, that I loose focus of God.
Sounds a little off I know :)
And Im like you, I very much have a Type A personality, which makes it very difficult to trust in God. Just last week, I sat with one of my leaders and I was crying over this.
You are a good person though, you have a good heatrt. So I say that has to count for something.

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gitz March 12, 2009 at 6:12 pm

That Holy Spirit did good work through you this morning, friend. :)

I was at a retreat once when the priest said that the hardest part of our journey with Christ was getting ourselves out of the way. That really stuck with me and I often find myself saying in prayer, “Please help me to move off the road so I don’t get in the way of the path you’re making me.”

Good reminder today…

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Patti March 12, 2009 at 7:43 pm

I too struggle with being a multi-tasker, even when the things I am doing are productive and worthwhile in my mind. This is a lesson I am learning with my daughter that translates to my relationship with the Lord, making time for her and getting my priorites in line.

Thanks for the great word…I am pondering for sure.

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Rebecca Louise. March 12, 2009 at 8:35 pm

I have heard many a times people in the same situation as you feel.

I have loved reading your blog! :) X.

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AngMomof3 March 12, 2009 at 8:43 pm

Gulp. Here, here. My list of “idols” looks a lot like yours.

I’m being spirtually challenged right now. God’s got some good stuff in store for me.

Thanks for sharing and helping me along this journey!

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brandiandboys March 13, 2009 at 1:21 am

beautifully written jessica! i love that you shared your heart, that transparency is inspiring!

we’ve gotta get that coffee on the books! 😉

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petrii March 13, 2009 at 1:46 am

Jessica,
I have so struggled with this very thing. I have a lot of things going so it’s easy for me to put the important things in the backseat if I’m not careful. Thank you so much for the reminder to keep the main thing, the main thing.

Have a Blessed evening,
Dawn

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Tasha March 13, 2009 at 3:54 am

Wow Jessica!Thank you for listening to the Holy Spirit.I really needed to hear this.I know that one of the things that I put above God is reading blogs.It takes up so much of my time.When I’m reading blogs though I never really feel like I am doing anything bad because there really isn’t anything innately wrong with reading blogs.It is when I find the time to read blogs and not spend time in His Word that things get tricky!Again thank you for writing what God layed on your heart!Still waiting for the day I can meet you and hug your neck!Hugs~Tasha in Indiana

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Mar March 13, 2009 at 12:22 pm

Ah, the sweet conviction of the Holy Spirit, reminding us that Christ is our greatest treasure and the One Thing Needed (Luke 10:42) Praying that you will find the time you need to sit at His feet and enjoy His company … everything else truly can wait! What a sweet thing that the Lord used your pastor’s words to give you the reminder we all need …

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Andrea @ Mommy Snacks.net March 13, 2009 at 6:19 pm

This is so true, girl! I got a message last year in my MOPS session because I felt like I just couldn’t do it all AND keep God #1. Well, I felt like I got permission to let things slack as long as I had some daily time with God. And, that time with Him didn’t have to be long and drawn out hands in the air time, it just had to be me coming to him completely – without interruption or other thoughts going on. I think it’s working out with this season of my life.

The good news is that I think He’s in whatever we do so while we may not be focused on Him while we’re running to each activity or hobby, God is in it and it gives us a great opportunity to be God to those who don’t know Him. Now, that’s pretty cool too.

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