I’ll never forget that day.
I’ll never forget the day she called me to tell me she was expecting.
I’ll never forget the day I called her, two months later, that I was pregnant too.
We did a lot of celebrating in the days leading up to January 7, 2008. You can imagine two best friends, pregnant at the same time, planning about the future and how their babies would grow up to be best friends, get married (if one of us had a boy), etc. That all changed pretty dramatically.
In the past year, I have watched my best friend change. I have changed too. We walked through some of the toughest months of our lives together. We cried together. We prayed together. We prayed apart. And though God chose to not let Audrey stay here with us, the story of Audrey lives on. The story of the Smith family lives on.
Angie put together a tribute video that I want to share with you here (if you haven’t already seen it on her blog). I watched it this morning as I rocked Elias back to sleep. And I cried. I’m crying now.
Crying because my best friend lost her daughter.
Crying because Elias and Audrey won’t grow up together like we planned.
Crying because it has been a really hard year.
Crying because in the midst of it all, God has been faithful – though I have had moments where I couldn’t see that.
Crying because I look at Audrey’s picture every day and it makes me sad.
Crying because I remember holding Audrey’s tiny body against my very pregnant belly.
Crying because I have Elias and Angie doesn’t have Audrey and that doesn’t seem fair.
Crying because sometimes I just need to cry.
Thank you to those of you who have walked through this story with us. You have been an example of God’s faithfulness. I never could have imagined the community that would come together through Audrey’s story. I love you all.