10 Weeks to Go

by jessicaturner on May 15, 2008

With the weddings behind us, Matthew and I are very focused on getting ready for Elias. We are tackling getting our small condo ready, which involves A LOT of purging/donating to Goodwill. It is amazing how much clutter two people can accumulate! This weekend, several sweet friends are going to come over and help repaint our bedroom. We are rearranging the furniture in it to allow for much of my scrapbooking supplies to be moved into our bedroom (since Eli’s room is replacing the guest/scrapbooking room, and I obviously won’t be able to scrapbook in his room when he is sleeping). It is going to make things a bit cramped, but we’ll make it work. I must admit, I will miss having a separate room for my supplies. I think though it will force me to stop buying products and use what I have! It will also force me to clean up my supplies after I use them, instead of leaving things in creative disarray.

My parents are coming for a visit in late June to help prepare the nursery. They are very excited. My dad is very handy (this is not a gift of Matthew’s) so I have a long Daddy-To-Do List running. :)


As you can see from my weekly picture posts, my belly is getting big. In fact, I am asked almost every day if I am having twins. I am continually amazed the gall that some people have. It is as if pregnancy gives people permission to be rude! Do you have any suggestions of ways I should respond?



{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }

Jill May 15, 2008 at 1:08 pm

I had to laugh at your post :) When I was about 36 weeks pregnant with my oldest daughter I was in the grocery store. I am short (only 5’2″) and probably did look huge, but a young man that worked at the store looked at me and said ..are you having TRIPLETS? I had to laugh..thinking to myself, am I really THAT big? I just said, nope…only one :) He looked back with the “I guess I probably shouldn’t have asked you that” look — and then he walked away. I still laugh about that 8 years later :)

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Chatty May 15, 2008 at 1:16 pm

LOL!

My sister in law used to get the SAME question, and finally she just started saying yes (to strangers). I’ve always wanted to respond, “No, just the one! And when are YOU due?” but would never have the nerve.

I think you look gorgeous. How very exciting that Eli’s arrival is coming in just 10 weeks!

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Disney Scrapper May 15, 2008 at 2:41 pm

I had to explain to my daughter the other day that new moms don’t exactly appreciate strangers coming up to touch your belly when you are pregnant (she thought all moms liked it). I think sometimes people just speak before they think…and in most cases there is not much we can do about it (well nothing that would be very christian like).

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staceyfike May 15, 2008 at 2:44 pm

haha! how about “no. are you?”
or you could just bust out in tears, that would get them. lol

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stephanie May 15, 2008 at 2:46 pm

I get that all the time when I am pregnant because I have BIG babies (almost 10 lbs., almost 11 lbs., and one over 11 lbs.) I finally just smile and say something about just having big babies or that since I’m shorter there’s no where for the baby to go but out. :)

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Tracy May 15, 2008 at 4:17 pm

I gained 65 pounds with my daughter (I’m only 5’4″ so I looked HUGE). I got the twins or big baby comment all the time and she was only 8 pounds. I just retained a ton of water. I lost the first 50 pounds within a month of having her.

It makes me sad that people think it’s okay to say that stuff to a pregnant women – you wouldn’t say that to a fat guy on the street, why do they say it to us???

You are beautiful and don’t let anyone else tell you different!

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Tiffany May 15, 2008 at 6:09 pm

Awww the rude strangers who feel that they can say anything to you. Oh and I love the people who just come up and rub your belly! I hated that! I usually just smiled overly sweet at them and said nooooooooo? And then I stared at them to make them feel uncomfortable. Don’t do what I did! I was a feisty one when I was prego. Usually you just have to smile politely and say no. Although being gracious to rude people is really hard!

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Jessica May 15, 2008 at 9:33 pm

You could get a t-shirt made that says, “I’m not having twins!”
At the end of my first pregnancy one woman I hadn’t seen in a while actually said…”Wow! You’ve gotten FAT!”
You just have to laugh it off. People just have no clue. :)

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The Kinsey Family May 16, 2008 at 2:04 am

(((((((( Jessica )))))))))) You look absolutely beautiful and I hope you’re planning to have some maternity photos taken! :)

People can be so rude! I was actually fairly small with my pregnancies, and I don’t say that to brag, but to share that it doesn’t matter, people are still rude! I would get questions as to when I was due, and when I would tell them I would hear things like, “OH! Well what’s wrong with your baby, you’re so small?!?” or “Are you trying to starve your baby by not eating or what?” That’s a really good way to freak out a first time pregnant mommy!

It’s probably not the most Christ-like response, so you can take it or leave it . . . but you could always just kick ’em in the shins and say, “Sorry, I can’t see what my feet are doing anymore!” :)

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Michelle May 16, 2008 at 2:13 am

I use to say, “Nope, how about you?”

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Mary Lou May 16, 2008 at 2:55 am

You look BEAUTIFUL!!! Just flash that smile of yours :) Can’t wait to meet him!

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Leah May 16, 2008 at 2:58 am

That is a wonderful pic of you. The blue looks great!

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Leanne May 16, 2008 at 3:29 pm

You look beautiful….

Unfortunately, everyone thinks they can step on everyone’s toes all the time.

There’s no right response to that question, only tell them it’s none of their business, kindly of course. Laugh it off and continually keep joy in your smile.

You don’t look like you’re having twins to me!

Boy, after 9 pregnancies, I wonder what I look like pregnant?? Septuplets?? LOL

Leanne in Longview

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Anonymous May 16, 2008 at 4:23 pm

Jess you are a beautiful, precious pregnant woman. Maybe if you just did what Jesus would have done, maybe give the person a big smile & say “thank you, I love you too!” or I am cherishing every minute of this special time God has given me with Elias. Saying something positive back to them instead of negative would probably really throw the person off.

I think pregnant women are gorgeous & it’s life given from our maker so………how can it be anything but beautiful.

Take care….love, Rose in Nashville

P.S. Thank you for encouraging Angie to continue to write in her blog. She is precious & I love her dearly too.

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Donna May 17, 2008 at 5:08 am

say, “Sure! Which shift can I put you down for? 1 a.m. or 4 a.m.?

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Kelli May 17, 2008 at 11:46 am

OMG people drive me nuts…actually it’s not just when your preggers that people feel the need to be rude, all you have to do is have kids…I’m in awe of the way people are. And half the time the reality is they don’t have kids yet or they are so old they forgot that part…

I’d just say flat out no I’m not and you saying that makes me feel….because people can’t deal with straight forward :)

AND MAY I JUST SAY….HOLY COW YOU LOOK AWESOME! BLUE IS YOUR BEST COLOR! YOU should wear it all the time :) and I love your little belly…wish I was there to touch it! LOL :) Hope you are well girl :)

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Pete Wilson May 17, 2008 at 3:01 pm

You’re looking great Jessica. Not much longer!

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Anonymous May 17, 2008 at 8:01 pm

Jessica,
You may not remember me but we’ve met at Scrapn Memories and I helped check you out at the POTATO consignment sale back in April. I have twins and for a while it bothered me when people made comments. Two things I wanted to tell you. 1. prepare yourself because after he is born you will be amazed by the number of folks who will lean over to look at him, breathing their germs on him and even touch him! You can help prevent this by covering the seat/carrier with a very light blanket. 2. as for people making comments I would say that you can either just try to ignore it and chalk it up to their not considering your feelings (read this as hormones) OR you could do what my sister (who is very loving but sounds like a jerk here) did…she had one of her best friends who continued to touch her belly and say how big she looked (she really looked bigger than she should because she is not very tall) when she was pregnant with her first child. She finally got so upset that she touched the unpregnant friends’ belly and commented on how big she was! Well, that did not happen again. Maybe you can’t touch a stranger on the belly, but you could say something like “no, I am not pregnant with twins/not due next week or whatever but I think my body looks great!” maybe it would make them think twice before a comment like that again.

Brooke

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Dana May 21, 2008 at 9:05 pm

Hey There,

This is Adam Ellis’ wife. I came across your blog through Adam, through Matthew. I saw this post and I just had to comment on it. I so feel you girl. People said the rudest things to me.. This one worked well.. I walked into Adam’s office at church. One of the elders was in there and as I walked in he said, “well hey there chunky”. I said, “You know what, when I have this baby, I’m going to lose this weight. But, you can’t do anything about being ugly”. Usually, I only dream of saying things like that but somehow pregnancy makes me lose that net that catches all the things you think but filter out and don’t actually say. And I did in fact say it. It was a wonderful moment of glory. One other rather large lady called me fatty and I said, “yes I know, I went to the doctor the other day and I weighed 160 lbs. I never thought I’d be that fat”. Since she was well over that weight, it shut her up pretty quick.

I think it’s because you’re a small, pretty girl. People seem to love to watch small people “grow”. You look beautiful!

Blessings!

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Brittany May 30, 2008 at 3:22 am

You could say “Huh! What are you talking about? I am not pregnant.” I always wanted to say that to someone when I was pregnant and received the you must be having twins or you are about to pop. I also hated when strangers would come up to me and say. Stranger-Yep it is a boy! Me-No, actually it is a girl, thanks. Ha! I found your blog through Angie’s

Cheers!

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